I was reading the February 4th issue of Fortune Magazine. This article caught my attention, “How To Get Hired By A ‘Best’ Company” By Anne Fisher. Rather than write up how it might apply to me, I thought it would be fun if Prince were applying for a new job.
It helps to know someone.
In addition to my former Masters at Time Warner, I know (biblical sense) lots of fine ladies such as: Vanity (Denise Matthews), Madonna, Sheila E, Anna Fantastic, Carmen Electra, Jill Jones, Apollonia Kotero, Kim Basinger, Sheena Easton, Robin Arcuri, Troy Beyer, Susanna Hoffs and Nona Gaye.
Play up volunteer work on your résumé.
I like to help out anyway I can, as long as it’s on my terms. I once donated a song for a little project called “We Are The World.” I was also instrumental in the formation of the Parents Music Resource Center (PMRC), just ask Tipper Gore.
Get ready to interview and interview… and interview.
Although I have a reputation for refusing all interviews I have occasionally granted an interviews- as long as I get to write the questions and you don’t mind absurd answers.
Unleash your inner storyteller.
“I knew a girl named Nikki/I guess you could say she was a sex fiend/I met her in a hotel lobby/Masturbating with a magazine” Yes, I have all kinds of stories to tell, but if you’re asking how I’ve handled troublesome situations in the past, I usually just have my bodyguards beat them up, or just wait until they go away. Often just getting a new girlfriend makes the old one go away. This also applies to band members.
Do creative research.
I know a lot about Best Company Records… I’m looking for a label that will let me do whatever I want, whenever I want, will market whatever I release, wherever I tell them too, without any guff, and without taking any of my money. My lawyers and accountants tell me BCR is desperate enough to be that label.
No lone rangers need apply.
Of course I’m a team player. Just ask The Revolution or the New Power Generation. On second thought maybe you should just take my word on this.
If you’ve moved around a lot, be ready to explain why.
I’m not sure I understand this question. I’ve stayed in the Minneapolis area all my life. I have a home in the LA, but that’s for business. I also tour extensively- I have to keep in touch my my customers you understand.
Be open to learning new things.
Are you kidding me- I play every instrument on my records. I write, record and produce songs. I write, star, direct and produce my own movies. I run a complex of companies. I even sell perfume. I was one of the first artists to take full advantage of the Internet. Even now I’m one of the first to use the Internet to sue my customers. This is something I learned from the record labels.
If at first you don’t succeed, don’t give up.
Listen, I want you to give me serious consideration. If you decide to pass, I’m still going to write you a song so you don’t forget about me. Maybe we can do business with one of my many side projects.
Don’t coast on their reputation.
Hey, I gotta run. I’m playing the half-time show at the Superbowl, but I want to thank you for your time. I hope I can do business with Best Company Records in the near future. I have a bunch or records in my vaults that I want to release.